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Doctor Solomons Traveling...
Episode 1 3rd Rock From The Sun "Doctor Solomons Traveling Alien Show"
Discovering that Harry has been kidnapped, the other aliens search for him, somewhat handicapped by the fact that the Big Giant Head is punishing them for not filing their reports by shutting down Dicks higher brain functions.
Added on January 1, 2009
Power Mad Dick
Episode 2 3rd Rock From The Sun "Power Mad Dick"
When Mary is named the new dean, Dick assumes her power also applies to him, and wastes no time in firing his nemesis from the lunchroom, Lucy -- who immediately files a grievance. Meanwhile, an excited Sally prepared to lose her virginity to Don, but finds herself unable to discuss the event with anyone.
Added on January 1, 2009
Feelin Albright
Episode 3 3rd Rock From The Sun "Feelin Albright"
When Sally learns that shes not Dons first girlfriend, she is consumed with retrospective jealousy and determines to track down his exes. Meanwhile, Dick learns what its like to be the deans boyfriend when everyone ignores him at a function except the other ""faculty wives"". He decides to prove his worth by staging a fashion show to raise money for repairs to the campus statue, but succeeds in raising only $100 above expenses. Meanwhile, Harry and Tommy ""creep out"" Mrs. Dubcek by setting themselves up in business with a lemonade stand.
Added on January 1, 2009
Collect Call for Dick
Episode 4 3rd Rock From The Sun "Collect Call for Dick"
After Dick almost bites into a ""Fuzzy Buddy"" in a fast-food restaurant burger, he becomes obsessed with the collectibles. Meanwhile, Tommy goes overboard on school spirit when he becomes the basketball teams mascot. The Solomons confront the collector mentality when they discover Fuzzy Buddies -- highly collectible small plush animal toys. Sally enjoys the thrill of the hunt and the prospects for financial rewards, Harry just thinks theyre cute, but for Dick its deeper -- he enjoys the sensation of collecting until it gets to be like a drug for him, and his family and friends have to do an intervention. In an effort to instill ""pep"" into Tommy, the basketball coach forces him to become the team mascot, ""Hootie the Owl."" Initially contemptuous, Tommy finds that folks (especially cute cheerleaders) dig him when hes in costume, and the power goes to his head. When the team loses, Tommy, high on school spirit, tackles the coach, landing him in the principals office.
Added on January 1, 2009
Whats Love Got To Do,...
Episode 5 3rd Rock From The Sun "Whats Love Got To Do, Got To Do With Dick?"
Dick, frustrated because busy dean Mary never seems to have time for him, finds himself increasingly enchanted with his new officemate, Jennifer. Confused by his feelings, he vows to resist the attraction, but its too much for him -- they kiss. Sally tries to fix Nina up with Dons friend Eric, then takes it as a personal insult when it doesnt turn out to be a love match. She schemes to bring them back together, but the only passion she manages to ignite between them is their rabid dislike for each other -- hardly a satisfying victory for Sally. Tommy fixes up the ""Love Tester"" machine at the bar where Harry works, then is miffed that he cant make it go higher than ""Cold Fish.""
Added on January 1, 2009
I Am Dick Pentameter!
Episode 6 3rd Rock From The Sun "I Am Dick Pentameter!"
Dick tells Mary he thinks they should see other people, and she laughingly agrees, not knowing he already has a candidate lined up--new officemate Jennifer. Dick is fascinated by Jennifers intoxicating giggle, her adorable penchant for rhyming, and the brave way she copes with her numerous food allergies. Just as a furious Albright learns of Dicks new dalliance, he begins to grow less and less enchanted with Jennifers eccentricities (particularly the rhyming), and to regret ever having ended things with Mary. Meanwhile, Sally, Harry, and Tommy question the limited functions of the kitchen and the living room, and decide to design an Uber-room with the best elements of each--"the Klivingtchen."
Added on January 1, 2009
D3: Judgement Day
Episode 7 3rd Rock From The Sun "D3: Judgement Day"
Dick decides to dump Jennifer and finagle his way back into Marys heart as an uproarious three-part romantic misadventure concludes. Dick, who has been driven to distraction by Jennifers allergies and constant rhyming, is in luck, at least as far as Mary is concerned: shes seen him with Jennifer and is willing to eat some crow to win him back. It would seem that Dick holds all the cards. Now all he has to do is play them. Meanwhile, Officer Don turns Sally on to the joys of bowling, and comes to wish that he hadnt.
Added on January 1, 2009
Indecent Dick
Episode 8 3rd Rock From The Sun "Indecent Dick"
When Playpen magazine arrives at Pendelton for a model search, the Solomons react to the issue of nudity in different ways. The idea intrigues Sally, who decides to pose---which infuriates Don, who chooses to cancel his lifetime subscription. As for Dick, he encourages Sally, but becomes apoplectic when he learns that Mary posed for art photos 20 years before. And Harry? He simply takes off his clothes. ""I just wanted to find out if this whole clothes thing is just a big scam,"" he explains. Meanwhile, Tommys overdressed: he wants to impress his new lab partner Alissa.
Added on January 1, 2009
Happy New Dick!
Episode 9 3rd Rock From The Sun "Happy New Dick!"
As the New Year approaches, Dick is in despair because he feels he hasnt accomplished anything all year. Meanwhile, Don gives Sally a necklace, then earrings, for Christmas but she wants more. Dick, pondering the significance of New Years Eve, fears that hes done nothing of consequence in 1998. When he mistakenly thinks its midnight a few minutes early, he embraces Mary and dances with her in the snow -- a perfect moment that he later realizes was not only his most meaningful act of 1998, but also a lovely way to start 1999. Harry hires Larry and Mrs. DeGuzman to work at Happy Dougs Bar with him, but theyre both so dang lazy, he fires them both on New Years Eve. Officer Don gets upset that Sally takes advantage of his nice-guy nature, and he lays down the law -- her cutesy, little-girl cajoling will no longer work on him. Sally realizes that with her feminine appeal comes a great deal of responsibility for using it benevolently, and she vows to do better in the New Year. Tommy,
Added on January 1, 2009
Two-Faced Dick
Episode 10 3rd Rock From The Sun "Two-Faced Dick"
The Big Giant Head grants Sallys three-year-old request for a ""gender reassignment"" - and switches her body with Dicks. Meanwhile, Harry takes over Happy Dougs bar while Doug is on vacation. Responding to a three-year-old request from Sally that she be given a male body, the Big Giant Head switches Sallys body with Dicks. Each of them has to cope with all the thorny details of gender reassignment, including such specifics as how to deal with mens catcalls, and where to find cute shoes in Dicks size. Plus, each of them has to successfully maintain the others romantic relationship. They each get as far as a kiss, but before things go any further, their request to switch back is granted, leaving them both far more knowledgeable about what its like to be a member of the opposite sex. Also, vacationing Doug leaves Harry in charge of the bar, which turns ugly when some tough-looking bikers start hanging out there. Just when Harry and Tommy have decided that the bikers arent such ba
Added on January 1, 2009
Dick Solomon of the Indiana...
Episode 11 3rd Rock From The Sun "Dick Solomon of the Indiana Solomons"
Dick receives an invitation to a family reunion that was meant for someone else, but decides to put down roots and pass himself off as Richard Solomon, the long-missing nephew of Abe and Florence Solomon in Indiana. But acquiring an extended family proves to have its drawbacks when Dick, Sally Harry and Tommy go to Indiana with Mary to meet their new relatives and discover the reason why the real Richard Solomon dropped out of sight 43 years ago. While Harry immediately clicks with crotchety Uncle Abe, Cousin Jacob is decidedly frosty to Dick. Meanwhile, Cousin Janine is more than frosty (shes downright freaked) when Tommy tries to get friendly with her. ""Were very distant cousins,"" he wails. ""You have no idea how distant we are.""
Added on January 1, 2009
Dick and Taxes
Episode 12 3rd Rock From The Sun "Dick and Taxes"
After three years on the planet, the Solomons finally learn about an organization called the IRS. They also learn that they owe it $9500. What to do? Dicks idea: ""We can lie."" Dicks never paid taxes, and after trying to fill out the forms himself, he enlists Marys help. When he sees how much he owes, he decides to be the only American ever to think of the brilliant idea of cheating on his taxes. When Dick gets an audit notice, Tommy has to fudge an explanation for what each family member has been doing for the past six years. The auditor, however, doesnt buy any of it -- even the ""were aliens"" defense, which hes heard before. The Solomons agree to pay their hefty tax bill, and thank their lucky stars their true identities are still a secret. As part of the tax deception, Sally pretends she had a failed home business -- a hair salon -- but when she puts up the sign, women start pouring in. Sally enjoys the camaraderie and the gossip, but never quite gets the hang of cutting hair,
Added on January 1, 2009
Sally Forth
Episode 13 3rd Rock From The Sun "Sally Forth"
When Sally tells Officer Don she cant take living with Dick, Harry, and Tommy anymore, he assumes that she wants him to propose. Sally realizes, however, that what she really wants is to start living as an independent woman, and they tearfully break off their engagement. When Dick has a tenant-landlord dispute with the Dubceks, he casts Harry out of the family for consorting with the enemy. The situation escalates to the point where Dick, frozen and filthy, is reduced to squatting in his apartment without benefit of heat or lights. The feud ends when Dick realizes he was so preoccupied that he didnt pay attention to an important milestone in Sallys life -- her all-too-brief engagement. When Alissa, the girl of his dreams, gets detention, Tommy works hard to get punished as well, in the hopes that it will provide him with the perfect opportunity to ask her out.
Added on January 1, 2009
Paranoid Dick
Episode 14 3rd Rock From The Sun "Paranoid Dick"
Albrights feeling a little uncertain about her waning power at the college, and Dick eggs her on into full-blown paranoia. As a result, she gets caught breaking into another professors office looking for evidence of a nonexistent conspiracy against her, and winds up losing her deanship. Meanwhile, Vicki Dubcek convinces Sally that the perfect thing to help her get over her breakup with Don is a weekend of riverboat gambling on the Cincinnati Queen. Vicki and Sally engage in the rituals of backstage flirtation with a seductive Neil Diamond impersonator. Harry manages to win big at gambling without getting hooked, but loses all of his winnings to the lure of the casino gift shop.
Added on January 1, 2009
The House That Dick Built...
Episode 15 3rd Rock From The Sun "The House That Dick Built"
Dick feels like his control over the mission is falling to pieces when Sally decides to move out, and Harry considers having a baby with Vicki Dubcek. Dick tries to sabotage Sallys attempts to find a new place, but Sally decides to rent the apartment over Mrs. Dubceks garage, Dick breaks in, posing as an intruder, to scare Sally into moving back home, but she beats the tar out of him. Meanwhile, Harrys debating whether or not he should have a baby with Vicki because hes unsure, both of his and Vickis parenting abilities, and of the consequences of human/alien interbreeding. The two of them drop in on the house where Tommys helping Alissa baby-sit so Harry can take the baby for a ""test drive."" When he sees how good Vicki is with the baby, he knows everythings going to be fine. Also, Tommy tries to figure out whether or not hes officially Alissas ""boyfriend.""
Added on January 1, 2009
Superstitious Dick
Episode 16 3rd Rock From The Sun "Superstitious Dick"
Dick receives a chain letter, but hesitates to discard it when he sees all of the ill fortune that befalls Mary after she scoffs and tosses hers out. When Dick does throw his away, he worries that he wont receive the prestigious physics grant hes applied for, and becomes obsessed with oddball charms and superstitious behaviors he thinks will bring him luck. What he doesnt realize until too late is that his weird behavior itself has caused him to lose the grant. Sally discovers the wonders of the Hardware Stop Superstore with the help of hunky and extremely competent employee Justin, and begins concocting problems just to spend time with him. Harry, whose orange shirt looks exactly like the Hardware Stop uniform, is baffled when other customers keep asking him to help them make keys, weigh bags of nails, and answer hardware questions. Also, chagrined that Alissa seems to have a massive crush on the Rutherford Ice Hogs star hockey player, Tommy becomes concerned that hes not manly e
Added on January 1, 2009
Y2dicK
Episode 17 3rd Rock From The Sun "Y2dicK"
Dick, whos never figured out computers, decides its time to get plugged in. He discovers e-mail and the internet, and withdraws completely from the physical world, relying on take-out food, chat rooms, and live video feeds, and shutting out people, fresh air, and sunlight. When Mary tries to drag him away, he knocks over a Big Gulp cup, shorting out his system. Venturing outside to find the fuse box, Dick realizes that his computer wasnt keeping him connected to the world -- it was keeping him separated. Sally and Tommy go to buy a new TV set, but the more they learn about the available technology, the less satisfied they are with each purchase they make, until theyve upgraded themselves into near-bankruptcy. Sadder but wiser, they return their expensive audiovisual equipment to the store. Also, Harrys all for trying to have a baby with Vicki, until the whole medical-science part of it makes it impossible for him to get in the mood. He tells Vicki its the natural way or no way, a
Added on January 1, 2009
Dick The Mouth Solomon
Episode 18 3rd Rock From The Sun "Dick The Mouth Solomon"
Sally meets a suave Italian-American man at a restaurant. He woos her, and when she learns he goes by the name of Sammy ""The Butcher"" Marchetti, she and Tommy are thrilled because they assume hes a mobster. Sammy asks Tommy to run errands for him, and Tommys excited to be working as -- he assumes -- a bag man for the Mob. When Sally and Tommy learn that Sams not actually a Mafioso but a real butcher, his appeal fades, and they both lose interest in him. Mary, concerned that she and Dick need to work on their communication skills, convinces him to go to a couples retreat. To her dismay, her good intentions get turned around as everyone there -- including Harry and Vicki, the poster children for public displays of affection -- embraces Dick for his openness, and criticizes Mary for her emotional unavailability.
Added on January 1, 2009
Citizen Solomon
Episode 19 3rd Rock From The Sun "Citizen Solomon"
Now that Sallys moved out and wont clean for them anymore, the male Solomons decide that its time to get a maid. They hire Marys cleaning woman, Cathy, an inscrutable woman who makes their place sparkle. Overwhelmed by the results, the Solomons begin thinking of Cathy less as help and more as a treasured family member -- despite the fact that Cathy gives them no encouragement to do so. Meanwhile, Sally, jealous of the guys affection for Cathy, decides that shell turn the tables -- if Cathy can ""steal"" Sallys family, Sally can steal Cathys. Finally, Cathy, tired of the Solomons intrusion into her private life, quits. Also, Tommy joins the staff of the school paper and is made editor, displaying a penchant for unearthing scandals both real and imagined. Busy with his new duties, Tommy assigns ex-girlfriend August to review Alissa in ""My Fair Lady."" Augusts review is unflattering but honest, and Tommy, true to his journalistic ideals, decides to run it. When confronted by a tear
Added on January 1, 2009
Alien Hunter
Episode 20 3rd Rock From The Sun "Alien Hunter"
A mysterious woman, Charlotte, turns up in Dicks life, claiming first to be auditing his class, then to be writing an article about him, then to be an ""intellectual groupie."" She charms Sally, Tommy, and Harry, who are happy to oblige when she offers to help plan the surprise birthday party that Dick has demanded they throw him. Dick is too busy having his ego stroked, and the family is too busy being grateful for her help, to wonder what Charlottes real story is -- which they regret when they learn shes an alien hunter, come to dissect Dicks brain with the help of her hulking son, Ned. Although Charlottes called all the invitees to tell them the partys canceled, they begin showing up anyway, interrupting the skull-cutting process. Ned ties them all up in Mrs. Dubceks basement. Sally, Harry, Tommy, Don, and the others run upstairs just as the FBI arrives to capture Charlotte, a well-known crackpot who has mistakenly thought any number of innocent citizens to be aliens. The Solom
Added on January 1, 2009
Dick vs. Strudwick
Episode 21 3rd Rock From The Sun "Dick vs. Strudwick"
Dicks faculty nemesis, Dr. Vincent Strudwick, writes a physics book thats hailed as a work of genius. When Dick realizes that writing a better book would expose him as a superior alien being, he seeks another means of getting even, finally seizing on Strudwicks displeasure at learning that his teenage daughter Alissa is dating dreaded Solomon spawn Tommy. Dick manipulates Alissa to cause trouble between her and her father, and the conflict comes to a head at the taping of a TV panel show about Strudwicks book, which erupts into Jerry Springer-style fisticuffs. Meanwhile, Sally and Don, feeling ""lonely"" since their breakup, find themselves succumbing to ""ex sex."" Also, once Albright befriends a group of misfit Nobel laureates who are in town to hail the publication of Strudwicks book, she cant shake them -- theyve imprinted on her like a litter of helpless kittens.
Added on January 1, 2009
Near Dick Experience
Episode 22 3rd Rock From The Sun "Near Dick Experience"
When Sally, Harry, and Tommy narrowly miss being crushed by a chandelier at a restaurant, their near-death experience fills them with a new reverence for life -- and fills Dick with jealousy that he wasnt able to share this deep experience. The newly enlightened trio volunteers at a soup kitchen for the homeless, and Dick signs up for a wilderness hiking trip with Mary, hoping like the dickens that hell lose his footing and find serenity via a near-death experience of his own. While Dick is trying desperately to have his own near-miss with death, the others learn that their new appreciation for every leaf, every bird, and every fellow man is fading rapidly with the passage of every hour. Sally, Tommy, and Harry have just about returned to being their blas, uncaring selves just as Dick joins them on the roof, bursting with news about how hes just managed to escape deaths clutches in a car accident. Now Dicks found a new love for life, but hes still the odd man out.
Added on January 1, 2009
Dicks Giant Headache (...
Episode 23 3rd Rock From The Sun "Dicks Giant Headache (1)"
The Big Giant Head announces his plans to visit the Solomons in person to chastise them for their poor mission performance. Dick tells Sally to move back in, orders Harry to stop trying to father a baby with Vicki, and tries to prepare Mary for the arrival of his old ""college chum,"" worrying privately that the supreme leader might not find her to have been a suitable use of his time. The family goes to the airport to meet the Big Giant Head (William Shatner), a drunken good-time charlie whos taken the name of ""Stone Phillips,"" and who, in short order, moves in and takes over their lives. Dick quickly loses favor with Stone, whos unimpressed both by his choice of girlfriend and his leadership skills. Stone is, however, quite taken by everything about Sally, especially the length of her legs and the shape of her torso, and decides to make her the High Commander instead of Dick. Meanwhile, Harry keeps trying to avoid Vicki, but eventually he tells her that they need to cool the baby thi
Added on January 1, 2009
Dicks Giant Headache (...
Episode 24 3rd Rock From The Sun "Dicks Giant Headache (2)"
Reeling in the aftermath of his demotion, Dick has to get used to taking orders from everyone else in the crew -- even Harry -- a humiliating experience that makes it difficult for him to perform sexually. Even though she didnt want to believe the familys taunts about the reasons for her promotion, Sally finally realizes Stone only made her High Commander because of her looks. Stone makes a pass at Albright, who declines and tells Dick, whos psyched that Stones changed his mind about Mary. Stone goes to the prom with Tommy and Alissa, where a drunken Stone dumps a punchbowl over Alissas head, then serenades the promgoers -- including a bedazzled Vicki, who decided it was finally time to attend her junior prom -- with ""Close To You."" In the high school hallway, Stone encounters Vicki and ""beams"" her up to his ""bachelor pod"" for some lovin. The next morning, Vicki turns up pregnant, and her pregnancy develops to full term in a matter of moments. Stone, who had been planning to make
Added on January 1, 2009