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The Pilot Episode Sanction...
Episode 1
The Middleman "The Pilot Episode Sanction"
Wendy Watson is thrust into the middle of a science experiment gone wrong while temping at a laboratory. Fortunately for Wendy, The Middleman, a crime fighting comic-book-like superhero, shows up to save the day.Impressed by how Wendy handles herself when faced with danger, and in need of a colleague, the Middleman recruits Wendy into his secret organisation.Recap:Artist Wendy Watson is working as a temp secretary at A.N.D. Laboratories, answering the phone and playing with her fathers Zippo. In her spare moments she tries to assure her mother she has an impressive job. Shes unaware that the experiment in the laboratory behind her has gone wrong until a composite DNA monster made up of dozens of limbs and tentacles breaks free. She drops her lighter and stabs it with a letter opener but is driven back when a smug-looking man arrives to shoot the creature. He ends up using a taser on it, causing it to blow up. He tells Wendy to keep the secret or die, and she agrees to keep the secret. He confirms shes telling the truth using a wrist device and compliments her, saying shes good under pressure. He notes hes just the Middleman, and slips away as the firefighters arrive.At an Italian restaurant, Don Colfair tries to determine who killed the Spoldoni family from a witness. Hes interrupted when a shadowy figure in a trench coat bursts in and guns down everyone except the witness, who slips out. The killer departs, leaving nothing but a banana.Wendy meets with her temp supervisor and learns that the police think her lighter caused the explosion. Wendy explains that the lighter belonged to her father, who died in an airplane crash, and she didnt start the fighter. She considers telling the truth but realizes the Middleman would kill her if she did. She tries finding a job without success and then goes back to her illegal sublet that she shares with another artist, Lacey Thornfeld. Going in, she chats with neighbor Noser, who plays the guitar in the hallway. Lacey explains that her animal support group will be leading a protest at a French restaurant that cooks rabbit. Wendy has taken a message from Wendys boyfriend Ben to meet later, and a call from a temp agency that Wendy has never heard of.Wendy goes to the Jolly Fats Wehawkin Employee Agency and is greeted by the supervisor, Ida. Ida puts Wendy through a series of grueling tests and finally just stares at her for a moment then introduces Wendy to her new boss: the Middleman. He explains the temp agency is a recruitment center that he uses to hire agents for special problems. Hes a contractor who deals with exotic situations involving mad scientists, androids, and monsters. He has Ida demonstrate shes actually an android but Wendy is unimpressed, and the Middleman notes that she has a high threshold for the unexpected and the unknown. The Middleman notes that she is a skilled video gamer but schedules her for an appointment with Sensei Ping for martial arts training. Wendy only wants to paint and the Middleman notes that he gave the cops the Zippo to frame her so shed have to come to him. Ida mentions a new job he has at an Italian restaurant and a furious Wendy storms off.Back at her sublet, Wendy has a brief exchange of trivia with Noser and finds that Ben the film student and boyfriend is in her bedroom. She meets him and tries to embrace, but Ben withdraws. It turns out he has a video camera and his friend Eddie, and his professor thinks he needs more pain in his life. So he breaks up with Wendy on-camera and she provides some more pain by attacking him and driving him out. She sits down to paint and works on an image of the DNA monster from the laboratory.The Middleman goes to the Italian restaurant with fake FBI ID. He starts to scan the place but is interrupted when Wendy arrives. He figures that she remembered the address from the agency and she admits that she has no choice but to take the job given her current employment situation. He explains that he works for someone, but he doesnt know who, and weapons and equipment just come in. He then finds the banana that the killer dropped and concludes an advanced intelligence is behind the murders. Wendy accepts the job.In an alleyway, another mob catches up to the witness from the restaurant and demand he identify the killer. He starts to do so but theyre interrupted when a banana falls from the fire escape above. The killer is there, and guns them down.Ida is doubling as an electron microscope and examining the banana, and finds genetically engineered spittle. They head out (leading Ida still plugged in), and go to Simionics Animal Laboratories impersonating sanitation inspectors. They meet with Dr. Gibbs, the head of the project to genetically engineer intelligent gorillas. They notice a cage with police tape and Gibbs explains that Spanky used to live there. Wendy notices some discolored paint and finds a secret room filled with Mafia memorabilia and bananas. Gibbs didnt know about the room but cant figure out why since Spankys mind is controlled by their mainframe, along with the other gorillas. She explains that Spanky was died in a flight simulator accident, but as they leave, the Middleman figures that Spanky faked his death and they cant let a super-intelligent ape gain control of the Mafia.They go to the Andolini Social Club, where the wise guys hang out. The Middleman plans to order a glass of milk and then get the information he needs. Wendy refuses to go and he has her hold his equipment. All of his equipment. He goes inside and the wise guys start running. The Middleman emerges with Tino, who runs all the rackets and is in good with the new boss. The Middleman enjoys some milk while slamming Tinos head into the car and explaining that he was a Navy SEAL and was taught over 456 ways of causing pain. He was recruited after saving his squadron and getting revenge on the man responsible. Tino finally breaks and directs them to a strip club where his boss is hanging out.The duo go to the strip club and confront Snappy, who is negotiating new deals and using a voice synthesizer. Spanky goes for his gun but the Middleman disarms him. The gorilla makes a break for it and rips off his clothing and voice synthesizer, then goes over a fence and into the gorilla den in the neighborhood zoo.The Middleman drops Wendy off at her sublet and she goes in. While chatting with Noser, she spots a banana and a shadow underneath the door. Setting off her wrist alarm and grabbing Nosers guitar, she jumps inside and clubs Ben, who came back to apologize. He tries to get her to take him back but theyre interrupted when the Middleman bursts in to rescue Wendy. When Lacey starts to hit on the Middleman, Wendy gets him outside only for Spanky to open fire. The Middleman goes out to deal with Spanky. When Wendy comes out, Spanky is locked up but he has a new voice box. They figure he got it from the lab and plan to head back. The Middleman insists that on going alone but Wendy insists on going with him. They rappel into the laboratory to access the computer, but another gorilla cuts Wendys line and she drops to the ground. A gorilla takes her hostage and Dr. Gibbs emerges to say shes behind the whole thing. The Middleman is forced to relinquish his gun and Gibbs explains she went into the mob business to raise money to take over the world with super apes. The Middleman threatens to blow up the computer but Gibbs calls his bluff and orders her gorilla to open fire. He drops to the ground as the gorillas gunfire hits the computer, destroying it. He sets up Gibbs to be taken in by the FBI but Wendy has an idea for what to do with the innocent brainwashed gorillas.Later, Lacey and her activists get the gorillas released into the wilderness and publicize their anti-rabbit killing campaign. The Middleman praises Wendy for her efforts, although shes unhappy that she was used as a hostage. The Middleman notes that maybe next time shell listen and then gives her back her fathers lighter. She goes inside and starts painting her newest adventure, while describing to her mother how happy she is with her new job.
Added on January 1, 2009
The Accidental Occidental...
Episode 2
The Middleman "The Accidental Occidental Conception"
Wendy and The Middleman attempt to stop a revived Terracotta Warrior from unleashing a hail of fire upon Earth.Recap:Wendy and Noser go to the police station to get Lacey out of jail after she was arrested for indecent exposure in a sushi restaurant. The desk sergeant finally lets Lacey go but Wendy is too exhausted to give her a hug back. When she says Laceys pranks are pointless, Lacey blows up at her.The next morning at Middleman HQ, Wendy comes in looking for coffee and explains what happens, and how she ended up sounding like her mother. The Middleman figures theyll make up but Wendy suggests they use the computers to wipe out Laceys permanent record. They get a new case but the Middleman suggests she sit it out. Wendy refuses and they go to check out the new case: a mudslide in a Chinese restaurant. They arrive to find the owner smothered to death in a pile of mud. The Middleman has Wendy look the scene over and she notices a terracotta warrior statue is missing and identifies it from a sheet. They talk to the busboy who saw the owner Mr. Su buried by mud, and was obsessed with the statue, chanting to it in Mandarin.On the way back to HQ, the Middleman admits he doesnt have a clue as hes not familiar with magic. He takes them to a consultant: Roxy Wasserman, who runs a fashion house. The Middleman explains that Roxy is a reformed succubus who runs a halfway house for soul-sucking demons. Roxy identifies the statue as an earth elemental, which can manipulate anything, and goes to work on a potion as water beats earth. However, she warns that the terracotta warriors were on a mission to find the last heir to the Emperor, take that person to the underworld, and unleash a hail of fire lasting a thousand years.The Middleman gives Wendy an inoculation en route as they prepare to go to China, and then drops her off at her sublet. She discovers Lacey talking to her mother and then mentions that shes "working" for Roxy. Lacey knows Roxy as someone who uses furs and prepares to go to the fashion house and throw some fake blood. When Wendy starts to object, Lacey angrily says she wont be calling her. Wendy then goes to Roxys fashion house and mentions fur coats, but Roxy doesnt plan on using fur coats for her summer shoot. She then tests Lacey on her ability to accessorize and is duly impressed, and hires her as her new assistant.At Middleman HQ, Wendy tries to call Lacey while Ida tries to locate the heir. The Middleman gives Wendy a few seconds to talk it out but assures her that the succubi are completely reformed. Ida comes up with a match: the heir is Duncan. They go to the junior high to track down Duncan. Meanwhile Lacey is dealing with her new duties, which include assembling the components for the water potion. When she hears that she has to get Tahiti Water, which is environmentally unsafe, she objects but Roxy doesnt care. She chats with a sympathetic Trevor, who seems interested in her... or at least her soul.The partners find Duncan on the playground but are interrupted when the Warrior appears from the bricks on the roof. The Middleman temporarily blasts the Warrior apart and they escape while it reassembles itself. They get a call that Roxy has finished the potion and go to Duncans home, where Lacey delivers the potion for her boss. The Middleman takes it and the two flirt back and forth while Wendy wonders what Lacey is up to. After she leaves, they go inside and talk to Duncans parents. His mother Jessica finally admits that she had an affair while she was in Shanghai. The two of them go out of the room, leaving Duncan, and Wendy tries to reassure him saying that her father disappeared when he was 14. Theyre interrupted when the Warrior enters the house and demands the heir. The Middleman throws the potion and it has no effect. Wendy realizes that Lacey must have substituted tap water. The Warrior buries the partners in mud and takes the boy.The Middleman and Wendy head back to Roxys, and Wendy blames herself for driving Lacey into the job. The Middleman says they need to talk later and promises to explain later. Roxy is working on another potion and blames Lacey, and Wendy takes offense. She finally determines that Roxy dealt with Lacy non-violently. She then calculates the Warriors route and shows that there is a new route that the Middleman can take. Roxy advises him to go alone but the Middleman has faith in Wendy. Roxy orders her minions to open a portal to the Underworld. Outside, Trevor talks to Lacey who admits she needs Wendy. However, when Trevor offers to help Lacey thinks of one thing he can do.Dressed in Grecian robes, the partners prepare to go to the Underworld. The Middleman is armed with a scythe that he has to hold to protect them from the dangers of the Underworld. He tries to make Wendy feel better by telling her a story about he got one of his teammates badly injured when he was pining over a girl. He insists hell give Wendy a hundred percent and expects her to do the same.Roxy begins the ritual and the partners find themselves in an office building lobby. They go to the information desk and Wendy notices a file room which the Middleman explains is a repository for the records of everyone who has ever died. They finally get the attention of the clerk who directs them upstairs. However, Wendy stays behind to get information on her father. When he refuses, she draws a gun on him but hes already dead. He concedes that shes funny and decides to help her.The Middleman finds the Warriors and attacks him, then orders Wendy to throw the potion only to realize shes not there. He grabs Duncan and runs downstairs just as the clerk delivers her fathers file. She runs upstairs, they meet, and head back downstairs to the elevator/portal. They get in and she throws the potion, destroying the Warrior in a large muddy explosion. They return to Roxys fashion house covered in mud but otherwise unharmed.The Middleman drops Wendy off at her apartment and she admits she let her personal life interfere. He says she came through in the end and thats all that matters, and she thinks her dad would have been proud. The Middleman notes that maybe he still is.As she goes up to her sublet she sees Lacey and Trevor coming down. She apologizes to Lacey, who explains that she took the job so she could get to Roxys fur room. But then she thought about Wendy said and came up with a new plan: she asked Roxy to donate the furs and now shes giving them to homeless people.
Added on January 1, 2009
The Sino-Mexican Revelation...
Episode 3
The Middleman "The Sino-Mexican Revelation"
Sensei Ping is abducted by a band of Mexican wrestlers. The Middleman benches Wendy who failed to stop Pings abduction and embarks on a solo rescue mission. However, despite The Middlemans efforts, he too is captured, which leaves Wendy to save the day.Recap:Lacey and Wendy are commiserating over money woes, and Wendy doesnt get paid until she completes training. Lacey reveals shes working at a pirate-themed sports bar where the waitress wear tight shirts and short skirts. On her way to work, Wendys car breaks down but a musician, Tyler, is passing by and offers help. Wendy mentions that Lacey is working at the Booty Chest and Tyler considers working there. As he gets the car working he mentions that he was offered a position at a temp office, but someone already had it. The office: The Jolly Fats Weehawkin Temp Agency.At Middleman HQ, the Middleman admits they looked for other people in case Wendy didnt cut it. The Middleman is cleaning up for Sensei Ping, his former master, and reminds Wendy not to mention Pings age, the fact he wears a Mexican wrestlers mask, or the Clan of Pointed Stick. He also makes sure Wendy has memorized the ritual greeting. Ida arrives and says O2STK wants them to check out a museum heist before they pick up Ping. The stolen item is a diamond that can be used to create a laser cage. They go to the museum and impersonate Mossad agents, and check the place out. Its been torn apart by freakishly tall people with perfect timing. The partners don scanning glasses and look around so Ida can run a forensic scan. With time running out, Wendy volunteers to go get it. The Middleman needs the company car and has her go to get Sensei on her own.At the airport, Wendy spots Sensei Ping, wearing his Mexican wrestling mask. He isnt impressed with her or her car. At the museum, the Middleman support an unclassified piece of biomass and Ida identifies it as chocolate mole. They both realize what that means: deadly danger for Wendy and Sensei Ping.Wendy finally snaps as Sensei Ping criticizes her car, and asks him the three things she isnt supposed to ask. He forces her to pull over and plans to make her pay, but she notes the O2STK wont be thrilled if he kills her. However, Sensei has paused because Mexican lucha libre wrestlers have surrounded them. The wrestlers use the stolen diamond to create a laser cage and contain Ping, and then knock Wendy out. The Middleman finds her later and wakes her up, and she explains how they were pulled over and Ping was captured. The Middleman recognizes the wrestlers as having a blood feud against Sensei Ping. However, Wendy has to explain how the car was pulled over and that she provoked Sensei Ping. The Middleman is not impressed and says that in 17 hours when Sensei Ping fails to meet with the Clan of the Pointed Stick, theyll send three assassins to kill them. He advises her to prepare to move overseas under a false identity and takes her off the case and sends her back to her sublet.Wendy gets back to the sublet and after chatting with Noser, goes inside to find some ice cream. Lacey has quit her job but remembers there were some Mexican wrestlers there at the Booty Chest. Wendy dons Laceys outfit and gives a cover story about needing to get back a contract. At Middleman HQ, the Middleman determines that a high-intensity laser was stolen from the University of Guadalajara and Ida determines it has the same power consumption signature as Teledyne Water Pik with a custom high-output heating element and an aftermarket turbo-powered water accelerator. Ida pinpoints the five people in the city who own the water pik.At the Booty Chest, Wendy spots the wrestlers and then finds that Tyler is working there. She claims to be doing research on an art project, and Tyler warns her away from the wrestlers. He learned about Mexican wrestling when he was raised as a military brat, and the two compare notes. Wendy insists on delivering food to the wrestlers and then takes their leader hostage with an atomic de-moleculizer. She demands to know where Sensei Ping is and he admits they have taken him to the Dread Pyramid of Itzilichlitlichlitzl in Yucatan. They also plan to capture the Middleman, Pings apprentice. They have a water pik hidden in a van outside to lure the Middleman in. Wendy drops her gun and takes on the wrestler, and Tyler comes to the rescue. Tyler and Wendy are thrown out as the wrestlers in the van knock out the Middleman and haul him away.Ida checks in and Wendy discovers that Tyler has been knocked unconscious. She advises Wendy to get away before the assassins and the police arrive, and leave Tyler for the paramedics. At Middleman HQ, Ida is buying tickets for Buenos Aires to avoid the assassins, but Wendy insists on rescuing Sensei Ping. She suggests they call O2STK, which Ida reveals they made it up and it just stands for "Organization Too Secret To Know." Ida suggests that Wendy fly using the Middlejet, which is parked above the Middleboat. Wendy notes that her pilot father taught her how to fly.Wendy flies to Yucatan but makes a call to Lacey en route. Lacey is dressed as a yellow teddy bear and at work and Wendy asks her to check on Tyler at the hospital. Lacey agrees, but admits she has to know what Wendys new job is. Wendy doesnt say anything.At the Dread Pyramid, Sensei Ping and the Middleman are both contained in the laser cage. The wrestlers leader, El Maestro De Ceremonias, arrives with his men and says Ping will pay for the murder of El Sapo Dorado, the greatest wrestler ever to slap the canvas. Ping demands to be heard and explains that El Sapo Dorado sought him out for the ultimate challenge. After a series of duels over 25 days, El Sapo Dorado finally suffered a fatal heart attack. Ping buried him with honors and took his mask as a tribute to the one man he could never best. Ping declares his right for trial by combat. El Maestro agrees and tells Ping to select his champion.Wendy locates the Pyramid but theres no landing strip. Ida advises her to bail out and parachute down, and then use the wrestlers plane to fly back. When Wendy proves reluctant, Ida does it for her.The Middleman prepares for battle and the wrestlers send in Cien Mscaras. Ping explains that the man was cursed by an Aztec mummy so he is now a hundred men wearing the same mask. All one hundred enter and the Middleman takes them on. He dispatches of at least 75 of them, but one of them gets his leg in a hold and breaks it. Meanwhile, Wendy sneaks in and disables the laser cannon. Sensei Ping is freed and he congratulates her, and then says hell take it from there. He also congratulates the Middleman, noting he was twice his age before he took on a hundred men. He removes the mask and declares the blood feud ends today. The wrestlers attack en masse but Sensei Ping defeats them all until only El Maestro De Ceremonias remains. The leader moves to attack Ping, who unleashes the Wu-Han Thumb of Death.Later back in the States, Wendy goes to visit Tyler but the doctor says he has two-day amnesia. When Tyler starts to wake up, Wendy makes a hasty exit.The Middleman comes to visit and chats briefly with Lacey. He totally understands that she has to wear a yellow teddy suit to create, having worn a badger suit as a boy. He finds Wendy painting a sad painting and notes that she impressed Sensei Ping. and the Middleman too. He gives her the first paycheck and a set of keys to a new StreetSmart car. Lacey notes that it has a vanity plate: MDDLMN2.
Added on January 1, 2009
The Manicoid Teleportation...
Episode 4
The Middleman "The Manicoid Teleportation Conundrum"
A group of peaceful aliens with an addiction to plastic surgery are being hunted down by a homicidal entity. Meanwhile, Ben puts his and Wendys break-up video on the internet: Wendy is not thrilled.Recap:Wendy is working on a painting of a gorilla with a gun and shows it off to Lacey. Lacey is less than thrilled but has to admit that Wendy is enthusiastic about her work. However, she also has to admit that Ben put their break-up on the Internet. Wendy brings up the video and isnt happy, and is even less happy when she finds out Ben advertised it with a bulk e-mailing.The next morning, The Middleman contacts a depressed Wendy with a priority message to meet him at the rendezvous point. He neglects to mention what the rendezvous point is. She goes to get her computer as Lacey watches Dr. Gil, a self-help guru. Lacey is worried that Wendy is suppressing and will start watching Italian zombie movies, but Wendy is too busy trying to find the rendezvous point, until Lacey mentions theres a Rendezvous Point Diner. Wendy goes there to find him waiting for her, and he notes hell be testing her on a wide range of subjects, particularly teamwork.A woman with an oddly distorted face, Isabel Schon, is shopping when a beam of light shoots down out of the sky and teleports her to a desert location. She sees a figure she recognizes pointing a gun at her, and is shot down.At Middleman HQ, Wendy is trying to reassure her mother that shes not worried about Ben, and The Middleman interrupts to inform her she needs to know everything there is to know about being a Middleman. He shows her The Middleman Dojo and The Middleman Changing Room, but is forced to admit he doesnt know who pays for it all. He then takes her to The Middleman Interrogation Room, where she gets to practice on a cute Interrodroid 3000 android. The Middleman monitors her when Ida reports that they have a red ball on the disappearance of a rich woman. Ida is less than thrilled with the idea of Wendy as a sidekick but theyre interrupted when Wendy demolishes the interrodroid. The Middleman suspects shes releasing her suppressed emotions.The Middleman takes her on the case and they check out the disappearance site. A teleport beam shoots down and deposits Isabel corpse on the spot it vanished from. The Middleman quickly concludes a teleportation beam is responsible. Ida identifies the body and they go to talk to Isabelles family. Isabels brother has the same extensive plastic surgery, as does her sister Doris. Doris mentions there was another attack but Isabels brother quickly denies it and asks them to leave.The Middleman and Wendy return to Middleman HQ where Ida has determined that there have been similar crimes in the last six months and several victims were missing their head. All of the victims shared the same plastic surgeon, Dr. Newleaf. Wendy assumes Newleaf is responsible, but theyre interrupted when Noser and Lacey arrive at the reception area to pay Wendy a visit and help her through her expected breakdown. Lacey gives Wendy a Dr. Gil DVD and doesnt believe shes okay with the break-up. When Lacey wants to see Wendys desk, The Middleman intervenes and pulls Wendy away on a fake emergency. He doesnt believe Newleaf is responsible and gets a rare gem out of the safe.They go to Newleafs Beauty Institute and The Middleman runs another test, giving her a Fish & Wildlife ID to use. They talk to Newleaf, who has the same plastic surgery. The Middleman shows Newleaf the gem and the doctor cant resist taking it and eating it. Newleaf hits the intruder alert button and two security guards arrive and they start speaking in alien tongue as Newleaf gives them orders to detain the Earthlings. Wendy goes for her gun only to find The Middleman has turned it off. He then tries a more peaceful approach and Newleaf insists that Wendy leave. The Middleman explains that the aliens are Manicoids, who blend into upper-class society where their normal appearance looks just like plastic surgery patients. Newleaf offers to talk to The Middleman once Wendy leaves.Outside, Wendy calls Lacey and finds out more bad news: Ben has received a substantial contract to make a movie out of his video. Meanwhile, Newleaf refuses The Middlemans offer of help but The Middleman gives him a signal watch to contact him just in case. Heading back to HQ, Wendy is angry that The Middleman doesnt trust her but he warns that her psych profile says that she will have problems with the break-up. She insists the psych profile is wrong and tosses it out the window. Back at her sublet, Wendy finds Lacey watching Dr. Gil again advising one of his guests that crying is okay. Wendy insists on going up to her bedroom.Dr. Newleaf is leaving his office when a teleportation beam strikes him and beams him away. The Middleman calls Wendy to the scene but en route she realizes that The Middleman gave Newleaf her watch, and it has a tracking device. The Middleman assure her that the watch has a signal for a reason, and hell always have her back. They follow the signal to KBTTF TV Broadcast Studio, which has the broadcast equipment necessary to send a teleport signal anywhere in the world. the find a secret room containing hunting trophies, including alien heads. Dr. Gill arrives and cheerfully admits that he hunts Manicoids for sport and has teleported Dr. Newleaf to his private hunting ground. Dr. Gil explains that his father opened fire on a UFO, but was crushed when it fell to earth. Dr. Gil salvaged its teleportation device and now hunts aliens for revenge. Dr. Gil opens fire and escapes through the teleporter, but Wendy leaps through after him before a stray shot destroys the controls.Dr. Gil opens fire on Wendy, who stumbles across Dr. Newleaf. She refuses to back down, draws her gun, and goes after Dr. Gil. However, the gun is still in shutdown mode because of The Middleman. She complains about her week and Dr. Gil offers some impromptu counseling. He assures her he wont leave her like her father and boyfriends and is then blasted to dust by a Manicoid UFO. The Middleman emerges along with Newleafs security team and Wendy admits that she knew that hed always be there for her and all she had to do was stall until he tracked her by the watch.Wendy returns home and makes up with Tracey, and they settle in to watch Italian zombie movies. However, theyre interrupted by a newscast announcing that Dr. Gil was trampled by a herd of runaway rhinos.
Added on January 1, 2009
The Flying Fish Zombification...
Episode 5
The Middleman "The Flying Fish Zombification"
Wendy and The Middleman work to contain a trout-eating zombie outbreak.Wendy is talking with her mother over the phone as Lacey paints. Lacey notes that her mother Dr. Barbara Thornfield only calls once a year if shes lucky. Wendy suggests Lacey might invite her mother to their upcoming art show, Art Crawl. Lacey agrees and tries to call and get past her mothers receptionist.At work, Wendy prepares for her first training session with Sensei Ping, learning that the Middleman cried during his session. Wendy goes in on her own, and 59 and a half minutes later, emerges saying it was the most incredible experience ever.Wendy returns home to find that Laceys mother said yes despite her mothers assistant Francis initially saying she wasnt available. Laceys worried that her mother actually rescheduled for her. Theyre interrupted when Wendy gets a call from Ida about a wife who threw an RV at her husband during their camping honeymoon and tried to eat his flesh. Lacey isnt thrilled at Wendy leaving but Wendy promises shell be at Art Crawl.The duo goes to the hospital and visit the victim, Rod Argent. He talks about how he was covered in trout gore and his wife Bonnie Blue came back from the pond and tackled him, then tried to chew his face off. The Middleman determines that Bonnie bit him after she went nuts and prepares to destroy Rods brain. He says it loudly enough for Rod to overhear and panic, proving hes not a zombie. As they leave, the Middleman notes one of Sensei Pings favorite sayings, but Wendy trumps him with another one. Ida calls them with a report of another zombie outbreak.Lacey and Noser discover that neighbor Pip is taking down Wendys paintings to make rooms for his own. However, Lacey quickly calms down once Noser points out that Pips father owns the building, and Pip tries to make sure hes performing at Art Crawl.Wendy and the Middleman arrive at a fish market and run inside to find a female zombie screaming for trout. The Middleman doses her with tranquilizers, and doses her again when she starts to revive. They take her to Middleman HQ and determine she still has a heartbeat, but if they dont find an antidote her heart will explode. Wendy is less than thrilled that she might miss Art Crawl. As they prepare to go out, Wendy suggests she might drive, as Sensei Ping thinks shes pretty good. The Middleman is reluctant and wants to do all the driving. Wendy responds with another of Pings sayings and the Middleman is forced to concede the issue.As the sublet residents prepare for Art Crawl, Pip tries to look dangerous. Laceys mom calls to say she has to meet with Henry Kissinger and cant make it.As Wendy drives, she wonders if the Middleman is jealous but he denies it. Theyre interrupted when Lacey calls her to give her the news about her mother. Wendy tries to reassure her and promises shell be there to watch Lacey perform. They get to the campground and the Middleman notices that Wendy has covered her scanner with skulls, since Sensei Ping likes skulls. Ida calls the Middleman to reveal Bonnie was bitten by a Peruvian Flying Pike. The Pike bites anything that moves and its venom turns its victims into zombies. They need the pineal fluid from a Flying Pike to synthesize a cure, and the Pike must be alive. Meanwhile, Wendy battles the Flying Pike and kills it.The Middleman gives her the bad news but Wendy notices a tag for the Odyssey Fishery. They check out the business and finds tanks filled with Peruvian Flying Fish. Several workers attack them and the duo dispose of the workers in 47 seconds flat using Pings techniques. The foreman reveals that a Mr. White pays cash and sends a truck once a month to pike up the Pike. Wendy is eager to clear up the case and get to Art Crawl, but the Middleman informs her theyve still got work to do.Noser does his performance piece, "Stump the Band," and calls Lacey on stage. Theres still no sign of Wendy, and Lacey calls Wendy. The duo is almost time and Wendy asks Lacey to buy her some time. Lacey warns that shes going to have to put the audience through hell. The Middleman finishes loading up the Pike, while Lacey has no choice but to have Pip perform his piece.Ida comes up with the cure and Bonnie recovers. However, the Middleman warns they need to check out every Mr. White within 200 miles. Wendy wonders if the Middleman is dumping on her because her training went so well. He insists that its all part of the job, but Wendy leaves for Art Crawl.The Art Crawl audience is going through hell and Wendy arrives just in time. She and Lacey don their costumes and take the stage. At Middleman HQ, the Middleman wonders if Wendy is right: Ida doesnt care. The women prepare to take the stage but Wendy gets a call and turns off her watch rather than respond. However, the Middleman arrives and Wendy tells him to wait ten minutes. He warns that theres a zombie attack in progress and Wendy has to leave as Lacey looks on.The duo returns to Middleman HQ where they have found a new zombie victim, Heidi. Lacey arrives and Wendy tries to explain. The Middleman tries to smooth things over but Lacey refuses to be taken in by another work-related emergency. They then ask Heidi more fish-related questions, and she reveals that she drank an energy drink, !!!!, that tasted like Peruvian Flying Pike and trout. Heidi explains that she went to a casting call for the drink, and stole a few cans on the way out. It turns out she was compelled to drink the energy drink, even though she doesnt like fish. They get Heidi direct them to the warehouse where they make the energy drink and head out.They find contaminated !!!! and the foreman shows up, revealing hes Mr. White. He explains that he was a poacher attacked by Peruvian Flying Pike. One of them bit him, leaving him impervious to pain. A friendly native gave him a cure and he used the venom to make !!!! and hook the world on his product. He plans to distribute it tonight, has turned the deputy commissioner of the FDA into a zombie, and has a backup plan: he drops dead fish on them. Dead trout! Mr. White then unleashes three zombified models, and the duo run, locking themselves in a room. Wendy admits that she screwed up, but the Middleman wants to know if Sensei Ping taught her the Devils Dance. When Wendy admits he didnt, the Middleman figures shell learn it quickly and they dispose of the models. They call Ida in to administer the antidotes and the Middleman directs Wendy to use the spare key in the Middlemobile which unleashes a turbojet. They get to the regional test center and quickly knock out Mr. White as he prepares the first shipment of !!!!Later at the sublet, Wendy apologizes for getting Laceys hopes up and Lacey accepts. Wendy is working on a painting of a fish-zombie woman and notes that shes just working out her issues, and assures Lacey that art will always come first for her. They start planning for the next Art Crawl with a supernatural theme.
Added on January 1, 2009
The Boyband Superfan Interrogation...
Episode 6
The Middleman "The Boyband Superfan Interrogation"
The Middleman and Wendy investigate a haughty 14-year-old named Cindy who has a dangerous obsession with Drysea, "the worlds most popular boy band".Recap:Wendy, Lacey, and Noser are trying to get illegal satellite and pick up Varsity Fanclub, the most popular boy band in the world. Lacey is a big fan and Noser and Wendy give her a hard time about it. Pip shows up and invites them to a gallery show hes hosting. Wendy is shocked to hear hes got a showing at a major gallery, The Gate. They check it out on the Internet and discover hes using Wendys painting of a gun-wielding gorilla.The next morning, Wendy gets a call from Ida that theres an emergency: a rip in space. Before she heads in, she confronts Pip but he denies copying any of her paintings and notes theres no way she can prove it. He warns that if Wendy pursues the matter, hell have his father kick them out.Wendy and the Middleman arrive at the Club Cairo to investigate the space riff, which has a duck caught in it. The Middleman tries to pass it off as their street magic act and then get the crowd to leave. The Middleman produces a warning cone to keep the crowd away and then retrieves the duck and takes it to HQ. As Ida runs a check, Wendy notices a box with new equipment: a truth bomb and a stun-field generator. When she tells the Middleman about her problems, the Middleman is furious at the idea of plagiarism. Ida pins something down but then a backlash knocks her out: theres another HEYDAR out there and shes being scanned. Ida "crashes" The Middleman reboots her and she has an address.The Middleman and Wendy head for the address, which belongs to a physicist, Dr. Elliot Marshall. En route Wendy gets a call from Lacey, who is preparing protest t-shirts. Wendy asks her to stop while the Middleman admits hes still mad about the whole thing. They confront Marshall who denies knowing anything about unusual technology. They look around his lab and find a HEYDAR that he doesnt seem to recognize, as well as a black box. Marshall goes to talk to his daughter Cindy while the Middleman notices that the lab tables are to low and the black box is missing a power source. They hear sounds of a struggle upstairs and confront Cindy, who has attacked her father. She throws lightning bolts at the agents and then grabs a box and flees, riding off on her bike at super speed.They talk to Marshall who is surprised at Cindys actions and explains that the girl appeared on his doorstep one day and promised if he took her in, hed get tenure. Cindy then forced him to steal equipment and then blackmailed him over the theft. He notes that besides the lab equipment, theres one other thing that stood out: she was obsessed with Varsity Fanclub. Ida calls to reveal shes done another HEYDAR scan and shes find five incrementally larger warp holes that have opened up at each of Varsity Fanclubs performances.The duo head for Varsity Fanclubs new performance in town and Lacey calls Wendy to inform her theyve hired a lawyer: Joe 90. Joe 90 assures them they have a case but Wendy asks Lacey to drop it.The Middleman and Wendy talk to the band and claim to be a celebrity protection organization and the band has a threat against them. They offer a free security protection but the band refuses any help. Ida calls and reveals shes buying cookies from a Wilderness Girl: Cindy in disguise. The Middleman figures out that Ida is pretending to buy cookies, but Cindy figures out Ida is trying to send a message and knocks her out. The Middleman and Wendy return to HQ and find Ida missing her battery, but are seemingly unaware that Cindy is clinging to the ceiling. The Middleman notices, and detonates the stun bomb, taking out Cindy and Wendy.Wendy recovers consciousness as the Middleman confines Cindy and concludes shes an alien. The Middleman discovers that the black box is a reverse switch for a warp hole generator, and if the box is activated then Idas battery will be depleted. The Middleman interrogates Cindy and she refuses to give up anything but her alien name, rank and serial number. He runs a search on the serial number and determines shes a rebel soldier from the Clothar galaxy. Her rebel army is opposing five alien tyrants and Cindy was sent to close warp holes.They get a message from the rebel war fleets high commander, High Aldwin, informing them they are ordered to release Cindy and let her complete her mission. The Middleman demands an explanation and he explains that the dictators were exiled to Earth to live in disgrace, but they formed Varsity Fanclub, made millions of dollars, and built a device warping them back to Clothar 5. Once the warp holes are closed, the dictators will be destroyed. High Aldwin warns that the Clotharian rebel fleet will open a warp hole to Earth and destroy the planet if they dont let Cindy complete her mission.The Middleman has no choice but to let Cindy go, but Wendy doesnt think Ida deserves to go out like that. Hes reluctant to do so but has no choice. Wendy returns home to find Lacey lining up her paintings and telling Wendy theyre crying for justice. Wendy reveals that Pip is blackmailing her with the threat of eviction, and refuses to let everyone sacrifice the sublet for them.Wendy returns to the temp agency where the Middleman is running the place without Ida. Wendy suggests they go to see Varsity Fanclub in concert and destroy their warp hole device before Cindy does. The Middleman has had the same idea and already bought tickets.The duo look for Cindy at the concert, unaware that shes arrived backstage and knocks out a security guard. Out front, Wendy realizes that the entire stage is a warp hole generator powered by the audiences screams of ecstasy. A warp hole starts to form and they head backstage and find a wounded Cindy. Wendy finds the black box in Cindys bag, and Cindy warns the black box is the only thing that can seal the warp hole. Cindy dies and then disappears in a burst of energy. The Middleman takes the box and activates it, and the band looks up as the warp hole closes, destroying them once and for all. A grieving Middleman and Wendy make a hasty exit.At the Gate, Pip is showing off "his" art while Wendy and the others tour the paintings. Wendy wishes him success, giving up, and Lacey threatens to stare at him until he renounces his sins. Pip isnt impressed. The Middleman arrives and says hes there to settle a score. He then puts the truth bomb in the food and Pip blurts out what he did and admits hes a talentless hack. He then runs screaming in terror and Wendy wonders if the Middleman is immune to the truth bomb. She asks him her name and he says his name is the same as his fathers. Everyone else starts blurting out truths as well. Later, Lacey thinks she intimidated Pip and invites Wendy out for drinks, but she has something to do.Back at Middleman HQ, the Middleman is packing Ida away as Wendy arrives to thank him. She says goodbye to Ida, leaving a flower, and notes the irony that Ida would have hated her sacrifice saving Earth. The Middleman asks for a moment alone with Ida and plays "Taps." Wendy heads downstairs and spots a crate. Ida smashes her way out and eagerly wants to know why everyones waiting around.
Added on January 1, 2009